Techno Tales: Letting Go (FLOW)

This was originally written in April 2018…

This piece is about letting go and allowing yourself to flow. Flow occurs when my true-self comes to the surface, bypassing the resistance generated by my ego, or thinking mind. In my experience, blockage of flow transpires when I’m concerned about judgement from external sources. Do I look cool right now? 

Ping pong was my favorite access to flow state before learning how to dance. Learning to dance didn’t involve anything technical at all. It was simply learning to let go and not give a fuck. I didn’t fully let go and dance until my first techno rave in January 2017.

Afterlife: January 9, 2017 – Tulum, Mexico

At the time, I wasn’t the biggest techno fan. I was more interested in making friends than surrendering to the music, probably because I didn’t know how. With such a loving and open-minded audience, I seamlessly made new friends. I’ll never forget sitting on the jungle floor in Tulum, sharing joints and philosophies on the human experience when someone enthusiastically shouted let’s go dance! Without a moment of contemplation, the entire crew rose to their feet and we made our way to the dance floor. I felt low level anxiety, thinking to myself, I don’t really know how to dance. Hahaha, hilarious to think back on this moment now.

Our crew stumbled upon a nice space with enough room to dance without stepping on any toes. It felt like everyone else melted into the music while I stood there, searching for guidance. I looked around and started to mimic the simpler dance moves I witnessed. I ended up doing the classic side-to-side techno 2 step. Okay okay, I got this. Nothing special, but I’m moving.

I closed my eyes and for the first time, I started to feel my body flow. I could distinctly feel the resistance brewing up from my mind, the ultimate buzz kill. I’d surrender into flow for a few seconds and then snap right back into my thinking mind. Do I look stupid right now? That’s when I looked at the dude next to me. Holy shit did he look stupid, and he didn’t give an ounce of a fuck. It was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. He was flowing and NOTHING else mattered. This completely kicked my ego in the nuts.

No one cares Lee, get over yourself. I closed my eyes and LET GO. It didn’t matter how I was moving or what it looked like, this was a state of freedom. During my dance between flow and ego, I started to analyze the bigger picture. Any judgement of my dance moves is coming from a place of insecurity. This isn’t exclusive to dancing, this applies to all my actions in life. If I’m going to let someone else’s insecure energy alter my ability to flow, I’m not living a life full of love.

Techno and LSD may have shown me the light, but they’re not required to practice accessing flow state. Breathing techniques, yoga, meditation, honesty with yourself and others, setting boundaries in your relationships… There’s a lot that goes into a life of flow and thanks to techno, I’m flowing more than ever.

Dancing is flow. Flow is love.